Few things are as annoying -- and as difficult to deal with -- as someone who asks nosy, prying questions.
Look the neighbor straight in the eye and tell them you demand that they respect your privacy and expect them to stop such behaviors immediately. Whoever she is, you need strategies for getting around her. You have the right to deal with neighbors who invade your privacy. If you believe that your neighbor is spying on you, consulting with a legal professional can provide you with the next course of action. Deflect the nosy person with the use of jokes, sarcasm or other comments to keep from answering the question. Focus on something more relevant. To My Nosy Neighbor, There you are again, peering through your window at every sound we make, at every thing we do. December 10, 2013.
There is such an abundance of rude questions – and people who ask them – that you could spend all day thinking of answers and quips. If you are on the receiving end, be prepared with answers that let the other person know what you think of his or her nosiness with as much poise as you can manage. You can also talk to your neighbors about what’s bothering you. Get kid-friendly recipes, fun activities plus parenting tips delivered right to your inbox. Be Prepared . If he or she still wants to know, the sale of a house is public record, and it can be found on the Internet by anyone who knows how to do a web search.
Here are some examples of how to respond: Debby Mayne is an etiquette expert and writer with 25+ years of experience. You may have to hurt her feelings, but protecting your privacy is more important. Do not get into a long conversation with the nosy person. There are times when women gain weight or wear certain outfits that make them appear pregnant when they haven’t gained an ounce.
Hopefully, the person will get the hint. Simply state that you are taking care of the situation, and that should be good enough information for her to get by. If a close friend or relative asks, you might want to give an honest answer. ", ”Do you realize how rude that question is?”. They’re griping about a 2x2 patch of weeds. Most people will accept that, but others who are extremely rude might press or insult you to get their answer. If you don’t like confrontation, you can still let your nosy neighbor know you won’t put up with their behavior. If using an attorney is prohibitively expensive, you may be able to consult with a local legal aid organization that may offer pro bono lawyers and paralegals for advice. Lumi Images/Hudolin-Kurtagic / Getty Images. It may be enough to discourage your neighbor from continuing to spy on you. Banar received her Bachelor of Arts in psychology from Buffalo State College and her Master of Arts in mental health counseling from Medaille College. Lampert obtained an associate's degree in nursing from Mercyhurst College Northeast. Be as nice and direct as possible, and be willing to suggest compromises. In other words, ignore him. You Might be Making These Etiquette Mistakes, How to React to Inappropriate Funeral Behavior, How to React When Friends Humiliate You in Public, How to Have Good Personal Relationship Etiquette. Copyright © 2020 Leaf Group Ltd., all rights reserved.
Neighbors who are particularly nosey can frustrate you by continually prying into your personal and professional life. There are some rude things you should never say, regardless of the situation.
Confrontation, however, can be effective in letting your neighbor know that you are aware of the spying. This question about money is quite common, even though it is considered rude and nosy to ask. Avoid rude or awkward questions with friends and coworkers. Speak with law enforcement, your landlord or homeowners association representative. One of the best ways to answer nosy questions is to turn it back on them.
An Open Letter to Nosy Neighbor is a personal letter of exasperation with a neighbor who is way too invasive of privacy. Not only that, but these people often seem to think you are somehow obliged to tell them what they want to know. The simplest answer is to say that you never discuss money with anyone but your spouse. Consult with a legal professional. If the person comes out and asks about your weight change, it is probably obvious, and chances are you have put on (or lost) a few pounds or more. By using The Spruce, you accept our, Henglein and Steets/ Cultura/ Getty Image. The onus of proof, however, is on the individual who believes a neighbor is spying on her. Being a so-called "peeping Tom" is considered to be a kind of voyeurism and is illegal in most municipalities. Regardless of the authority you choose, be sure to have them provide you with documentation that you have made a complaint. When explaining your concerns to your neighbor, stick to facts and don't infer anything. Redirect the person by asking her questions in response, such as why she wants to know or needs to know. How about you? Call ahead and pick a time to talk.
I think they took us for renters and tried to get us in trouble with our landlord by sending my parents a complaint (no complaint was ever filed with us). The most important thing to remember is that responding to rudeness with rudeness rarely accomplishes anything. There are several ways to handle these people: with the answer they are looking for, with a quippy comeback, or with a way of letting them know that you consider them boorish for asking such a question. Here is another money question that doesn’t deserve an answer. She covers professional, social, children's, wedding, and funeral etiquette. Armed with any evidence you have collected, going to the appropriate authorities also puts the responsibility of dealing with your spying neighbors in their hands. The Spruce uses cookies to provide you with a great user experience. However, this shows that they either haven't learned proper etiquette or simply don't care. For times that you find yourself in the awkward position of being interrogated by a rude person, you need to arm yourself with some answers that will let him or her know that you consider the questions rude. You can't always choose your neighbors.
Both my partner and I are extremely busy with work and finishing school. When the rude person appears confused, say, “Bill and I thought we’d wait a couple of years before starting a family.” And then don’t wear that outfit again or add a belt if you don't want to get asked that same question again. It can also make a bad situation worse, create hard feelings, and make you look worse than the person who asked the nosy question. For times that you find yourself in the awkward position of being interrogated by a rude person, you need to arm yourself with some answers that will let him or her know that you consider the questions rude.